Accomplishments!

Good evening bloggers! So, today I finished my core management classes @ SBH! After 6 weeks of alternating schedules, switching shifts & early mornings & over night shifts with no rest- I successfully completed my classes! I am so proud of this accomplishment. I also received my critical care SDU certification, another accomplishment I am very proud of! I feel like I am progressively climbing up my mountain & will conquer it really soon. And believe me, when I get to the top I am definitely going to stick a flag with my name, Delilah Escamilla, on it!  Next level up: finishing grad school. But for now I will share my recent accomplishments with you:

I know that the time I take away from my family, will be all worth it. My schedule has been crazy- working 2 jobs & attending classes @ both institutions simultaneously has not been easy, but all my sacrifices are paying off. Starting in January I will be shaving a day off my work week & will be working 2 12-hour shifts @ both jobs; this schedule will hopefully allow me to return to grad school @ RU & finish my clinical track. As I climb my mountain & acquire all my certifications & degree, my confidence grows & I have my family & friends to thank for that feeling! I love you guys- I also want to thank my followers, although you don't right any comments, I know you're following me. You make comments on my FB; & when you all do I smile & the endorphins @ are @ a high level! I just wish my brother was alive to share all my accomplishments with me! God I miss that crazy hag, I love him so much & miss him terribly!

I also spent some quality time with the Shami man- got a shape up, was hanging tough, ate dinner & tried to watch movies with the young man!

But instead he dissed Marley & me & this is what it looked like:

So as I leave you this evening, instead of giving you a quote, I will leave you with an image & a quote, enjoy!

I am truly motivated by the love I have for my family, although my daughters don't think that, I am. Everything that I do is for the love for my family I want to show them that all things are possible through faith, will, & hard work! I love you guys Sade, Sasha, Shadasha, Shuan, Shamorr, Chris, Tony, & Fatim!
P.S. I am in the process of changing my name back to Escamilla- Fisher is no longer worthy of me! LOL

Double edge sword!/ I believe in you!

First & foremost, Happy Thanksgiving to all of you. As for the title of this blog, I feel like, I have been grateful for being able to work so hard, but, as I work this hard- I realize that my family has been shrinking! I miss those days when the house was full of people & laughter. Those Friday nights, when family & friends came over & we had movie nights filled with good conversations & sometimes family games. I know right now it's not feasible for all our crazy schedules. With work, college & other endeavors, my family has lost insight on what's important. I hate to write it, but I feel like I'm responsible for this dynamic. I have been working so hard just to stay afloat, that I've gotten so used to working everyday & when I don't work I feel worthless. I have forgotten why I work so hard, my family. My mental reminder has been failing me! But here it is:

And although, today, I will be going to work & missing both of my sons (Bebe in NM, & Shami in DE), I hope to spend the remainder of Thanksgiving with the 3 musketeers: Sade, Sasha, & Dasha! I also don't want to forget who is too important not to mention, myself:

This goes to my kids & myself, because we all need to hear it & it's how I feel right now:

I believe in you-
in the things that are important to you & the way you choose to live your life...
I believe you can accomplish anything you set out to do, that you have many talents & the wisdom to use them well...
I believe you have what it takes to overcome obstacles & grow from every experience life brings your way...
I believe in your courage, your compassion, your integrity, & your strength. I believe in your goodness, your love, your intelligence, your skills & your soul! I believe in all that you are-
I believe in you! Each & everyone of you:
Sade, I believe in your diligence:

Sasha, I believe in your compassion:

Shadasha, I believe in your intelligence:

Bebe (Shuan) I believe in your talent:

Shamorr (Shami), I believe in your sentiment:

And Dale (Chris), I believe in you!:

And Mark, I believe there is still some good in you, somewhere:

(& if not, this is how I want to remember you)

And as I pour my soul into this particular blog, I have to mention that I believe in myself, I believe that this time next year my family WILL BE together (minus Mark) & we will have a movie night, enjoy good conversation, play games & start a new tradition!

Enjoy your families & never take them for granted!
Love y'all! (Paula Deen voice)

Just me & mine!

So, since January 6th, I have been put in a situation that I did not want or deserve; I can remember crying @ every turn & asking why me? But, here I am almost 12 months in the making & I am proud to say I have answered all those questions & here are the answers I formulated & know to be true: first answer (why me?) because God knows how resilient I am, & he knows that deep down inside I was not happy; because I am a genuine person, who is a social butterfly & my partner @ the time is completely the opposite. I was also very unhappy in NM, away from my family & my friends whom I love very much & although I loved my ex-husband more than myself, I had to get out of that toxic relationship. It was hindering my potential, everyone who has ever met me knows that I am a fun loving person who has an unfiltered mouth, I say what I feel & don't apologize for it; I'm not phony & I always put others first & that is what makes me so unique & those who know this of me, always tell me I need to concentrate on myself!

But in all honesty, I never was a selfish person. For as long as I can remember I always took care of other people. From my nephew, kids, baby daddy, brother, cousin, grandma & lastly ex-husband. I continue to take care of my grown children & I know that I need to stop & try to learn how to focus on myself. Slowly but surely I am learning how to take care of myself. With the help of my son, Shamorr, who is always telling me, "Mom go out, have fun, you have potential", I love this kid- he truly is an old soul.

And of course my friends are always encouraging me to go out & have a good time. I am finally loving the person I am becoming & although my daughters are not use to it (not all, just my oldest), I am starting to enjoy my life. I know I still have allot to accomplish in my life, but the hardest part is developing a plan, & I already have that down. I feel like I can do anything & although I don't have a partner to support me, I have my family & friends & that to me, means the world to me.

And Mark, if you are reading this, I want to thank you for leaving me with nothing; & forcing me to realize that I am a strong person & no matter what happens in my life- I can bounce back from it! I also want to thank you for the 13 years of good memories & all that  you did for my children & me, without you I would not have the confidence I possess! And although you went about it a f*cked up way, I know you're human & you are allowed to make these types of mistakes & I hope your new relationship was worth breaking up our family! And this is how I heal & if you don't like it.... not my problem anymore- Good Luck in NM! (Sue me!)

I also want to take a minute to thank those people  who encourage me to press on, I love you all & I promise to never lose myself to anybody ever again! Holly, Joanna, & Denise, you gals talk to me with honesty & don't bite your tongue when you're counseling me.

Although I have allot of close sistas, these 3 have been very instrumental to getting me where I am today! They make sure I stay busy & focused on what I want & who I am! And this is my truth- love it or leave it, better yet, love me or leave me alone!

Quote: Life is too damn short to worry about people who are irrelevant to my life, so I'm gonna say what I feel (write what I feel, in my case) let it manifest & let it go & wish & pray for better things to come to my life, because I am a good person & deserve to be happy! Me, Delilah Escamilla

Working hard/ Playing hard

So, it has been a while since I blogged; but I have been learning how to play as hard as I work! It all started after a 5 night stretch & 1 day of management classes. Friday we, Joanna & me, went to HUMC logo & name change ceremony @ Metlife Stadium, formerly Giants Stadium:

We are now known as Hackensack @ UMC, formerly known as HUMC; I believe Hoboken stole HUMC, so now we have a new entity & a new logo. We then proceeded with the party @ Pointin Still Pub, with the day shift from 4LW:

And after that, the chocolate sista & I went to Shadows in NYC to celebrate Ni's bday & her Calender release:

HBD Ni! & congratulation on your calender, you look hot girl! Oh, & the top picture is our bouncer who was in the VIP lounge with us- No sleep for the weary- got home @ 5 am (just think of it as an early work night!). We still had to go to our monthly "dinner outing", so we only slept 5 hours & headed out to the Bronx to the pick of the month: Dominick's Italian Cuisine (Kevin's pick):

So here we are: Kevin, Lillibeth, Denise, Minh, Joanna, Jodi, Phil & of course me! I love my prude crew & their spouses & my chocolate sister! These outings all began to cheer me up & help me get through my "almost" depression, & now we have a full blown tradition! Next month is Denise's choice, hope she makes a good one! As you can see the portions were on point, pictured above are: chicken franscese, chicken marsala, chicken parmesan, & my plate seafood pasta! Next up, Moet's b-day celebration in Jersey City:

Us being silly as we prepare for a night of dancing & celebrating Moet's 42nd birthday; was too busy dancing & having fun to take pictures @ the club (so mad @  myself for that). But, we truly had a great time & got in @ 4 am; had 4 hours sleep & woke up to pay bills, rake leaves & then a 12 hr shift @ the Hack, back to business!

Quote: Yo ass need to have some fun, cause you work to damn hard! Denise Milton

Enjoying the different cultures!

So on my last night in the city of brotherly love I enjoyed a movie with my NM brat & had a long therapeutic discussion with my vanilla sista! We talked & she was very honest & concerned for my health, she thinks I work too much; but, for right now, the work schedule has been therapeutic for me. As of January I will definitely be cutting back a day from my work schedule & be able to enjoy my life a little more. I also decided to wait to go back to grad school. I think I will hold off until the girls finish undergrad & maybe go back in the summer or fall of 2012. I share with you some pix of my NM brats:

As you can see Mr. Meade was upset that I was leaving & Ms. Ashby is going to miss "silly Ms. D", as for my Vanilla sista: Holly, I appreciated the 2 days I spent with you & your family- thanks for having me & spending time with me! I miss you guys, but I don't miss NM!

Shifting gears, I rushed back home to support my chocolate sista! We went to NYC to take a tour of her new school FCI (French Culinary Institute)! I am so excited for her. We hit the city early this morning & enjoyed some of the views it had to offer:

 Live @ Union Square, square, square, square, ooooooh what's the matter with your DJ MC Shan,
don't you know that he's out of touch! (for my old hip hop heads)

After a nice long, brisk walk from Union Square to FCI we finally got to our destination:

My sista, Denise, her adventure is about to start! What was so funny, was that the presentation was halted & we were told that the demonstration would include an alcoholic beverage & they thought we were under aged! Too funny, the lady was amazed to find out we were both in our forties! I guess we STILL look young! SMH, what do you guys think:

By the way these are just a few of the creations we saw during the tour:

Now let me show you my sista's skills:

Quote for tonight: In life shit happens, sometimes for a good damn reason!- Denise Milton