Prosperous Soul: February 2013

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Confliction

I know life isn't life without conflicts, but my life has had more conflicts that I care to mention. I have been in a funk for 2 days now, suffering with migraine headaches & feeling malaise. My physical body was manifesting what my mind had suffered. I recently found out some news that wounded me mentally, then manifested into physical symptoms- this is how powerful our minds are! After being home for 2 days & spending time with my daughters & son, I realized that I have to get out of this funk & press on.

So, here I am @ 3 am, releasing the hurt & picking myself back up so I can face the world this morning. The more life knocks me down, the stronger I get back up!

As I try to find peace within myself, I have to remember that I have 5 people watching me & most importantly I have to stay strong for myself!

So to those of you who look @ me & try to judge me- don't; not until you have walked in my shoes & overcome all the obstacles that had to conquer!

I am picking up my weapon of choice, my writing, & continuing my fight! I won't give up until there is no life left in me!

Sunday, February 17, 2013

Ambition vs. Responsibility

Good morning bloggers,

So as most of you know I had a mini vacation & decided to go to Las Vegas, NV with one of my co-workers. It tickled me that all of my friends were so excited for me to get some R & R, everybody knows that I work everyday & only have 1 day a week off 3 wks/month & 1 wkd off monthly, to sum it all up I only have 5 days off a month. And no I am not a doctor or clergy, but I do have their hours. I really don't mind, just because work does not feel like work to me. I love what I do @ both my jobs & I can't say enough about my colleagues, they're family to me. Needless to say I love going to work & don't mind the hours.
My only regret is that it does limit my time with my biological family & it has caused some chaos with my youngest son. Time has definitely made the situation much better, & my son understands that I am the only one providing, he still doesn't like it- but I am working on it. I try to make it a point to spend time with him on my days off, but he always manages to slip out & be with his friends instead.
The 4 day wkd retreat was indeed what the doctor ordered, to just rest & focus on myself & not worry about anything including Marley. I needed this vacation, my body told me so when we got there! I was suppose to take a nap & winded up sleeping until the next day- my body needed to be re-energized & it got that after 1 night! I was glad to hear that one of my closest friends was also in sin city, so we got a chance to catch up & she still encourages me to publish my blog & write a book- she still thinks I'm amazing; thanks Holly I love you & miss you, can't wait to spend time with you & your family in May for Bebe's graduation!
Before going on vacation, I was offered a job @ New York Presbyterian Hospital, & I have to tell you it was very hard turning down the offer. For the longest time I have been saying I want to move back to my beloved NYC, but I have to hold off until my youngest son graduates & goes off to college. There is something about the city of Manhattan that draws me back to it, I don't know what it is, but I am hoping it will be my true love (you never know).
When I got back home from my mini vacation, I stumbled upon some news regarding my ex, congratulations, you finally got what you wanted a baby @ 45! I wish you the best life has to offer- mazal tov!
As for me, my true work begins, I had dinner with another close sister, Monique- she also continues to encourage me & really believes I have a chance @ a book. Now I am hearing the same encouragement from 2 very different women, 1 a physician & the other a lawyer, both intelligent & respected & their opinions are highly revered by me. I owe it to myself to take a chance @ my passion, which is writing. And although I am in the process of returning to grad school, I have to explore this option; I owe it to my craft. It would be irresponsible of me if I don't!
Hence the title to this entry: Ambition vs. Responsibility- am I being ambitious by working this hard & trying to pursue all that I want to achieve, or do I owe it myself to do all these things & it is my responsibility to achieve all these goals?????
I leave you all with images of my short retreat in LV:

The Bellagio water show

Our limo for the night

Relaxing in the limo

Dinner @ Harrah's

Inside Ski high mall

Thunderstorm show inside mall

Waterfall outside of the Palazzo

Inside the Palazzo mall

Jessica & me getting ready for a night out

The Venetian celebrating Chinese NY- year of the Snake

Eiffel tower in LV

Wishing Fountain in front of Caesar's Palace

The water show in front of the Bellagio

You had to be there

Caesar's Palace statues

someone had a syncopal episode & I had to put my RN cape on

(Me in the black calling 911)

Jack Sparrow & me

@ the Halo Bar

The boat in front of Treasure Island

The famous Siegfried & Roy

The infamous Trump Tower

Until next time! ;-)

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Family= Love

Good morning bloggers,

I come to you from my bed, after dropping off my big headed baby @ school because he bought roses for his GF & wanted to surprise her @ her locker this morning. How thoughtful! I have to say he is a chip off the old block, unfortunately the block has become harder & passionate gestures have become a thing of my past.
I have been working diligently to forget & move pass my divorce, but in doing so, I have neglected & chased away those whom I love deeply & dearly, my kids. If you don't know by now, my tribe called mess is my drive. I began my maternal career @ 17 years of age & my daughter, Sade, became my rock & my fuel to continue to push myself to no limit. By the time I was 20, I had 3 beautiful daughters & they defined who I became. At 27 I had 5 kids, the addition of my boys gave me the drive to leave their father alone & forced me to find a career that I would do well in, as an excellent caregiver, the choice was obvious: RN. Having been a mom, made it an easy endeavour to achieve. Getting through nursing school & finishing valedictorian was an honor.
Now, with 2 college graduates, 1 finishing college, another finishing high school & my youngest half way through high school- I feel like my hard work is paying off! My family may not be perfect, but we have each others back. We can pick on each other, but don't let anybody else try to do the same & we pounce!
So I write this brief synopsis on this Valentines day to remind all of you that true love begins with self & family. Having strong family bonds starts with a determined parent & leads to self love & eventually contributes to a solid personal & passionate relationship!
I share with you my pride & joy!

Solid: together we stand strong!