Wired differently

 Good evening bloggers,

Still working, studying and interning, with intervals for some socializing. I got a chance to speak with my nursing school mentor. And she wants me to come and present to the junior clinical nursing students about my profession. I told her that after almost 18 years and working in so many different levels and specialties in nursing that I was not the right person to come speak to young innocent students. She told me that I am a “tough cookie”, my response was : this cookie is crumbling (when it comes to nursing). I also told her that every night before I go to work I ask God to replenish my patience. There are nights where I catch myself running out of patience and I have to walk away or talk myself back into calmness. 

As I am venting to my mentor, Paula, she stops me mid discussion to remind me that I am wired differently and that women like us have ceased to exist. We move forward so effortlessly regardless to what happens to us on any given situation. She reminded me how old I was when I started nursing school and how she remembered my kids being with me in lecture halls when I broke my leg and how well behaved they were during 1 hour lecture classes. I genuinely forgot about all of that, she also reminded me of how broken I was when I came back from New Mexico from my separation, then eventually my divorce and how determined I was to move forward  and do something for myself and my family. She was also there during my mother’s funeral and reminded me how strongly I held it together for the rest of my family.

So I write this entry to not only remind myself of my unique wiring, but to also celebrate my tribe of sistas that are always here for me whenever I forget who I am and how far I have come! From my day one Denise to my twin sista Dani, to my always comforting sista Kimmy! I have so many female friends that I call my sistas and a few male friends that always remind me of who I am and how far I have come, and that my wiring is truly distinct!

Singledom

 Good morning bloggers,

I know, it’s been forever! (Technically almost 5 months) I have been busy with work, grad school, interning and family. I also have to come clean with you guys, I was in a situation-ship the last (almost) 4 years. I guess I had gotten comfortable and given my schedule it was convenient for the both of us to have this situation. But he has moved out of state and to be honest I miss that situation (and him, of course). I had mentioned a long-distance situation, but let’s be honest, that won’t work for me. I obviously require someone who is conveniently located 😏! His absence has made me realize that I require intimate affection and intelligence! I did learn patience and detachment from him and am eternally grateful for those lessons. 

As I continue my educational journey I am learning allot about myself and human behavior and relational dynamics. The more I learn the more I am beginning to think that I might end up single for the rest of my life!? I want to believe that I have a twin flame or somebody who possesses MOST of the traits that I require. Am I asking for too much? 

Anyways, school has been steady, I actually have a flow now and am capable of cranking out 2 papers a week! I also have learned how to make educational videos, PowerPoints and heartfelt posts for in depth discussions. So far I have straight A’s and 31/64 credits for my masters. As of September 2022, I am a doctorate student, and let me tell you it has been one hell of a journey! I have no regrets! I feel like the older I get the more sharp my mind becomes (is that even possible?)! 

As for my social status, I am back in the dating pool, but I refuse to put forth too much energy in that endeavor due to the multiple failures that I have endured! I will tread lightly and allow my vibe and energy to manifest my life partner. Until then, I will continue to grow mentally, emotionally and intellectually. 

As for my family, I am glad to report that slowly, but surely, things are falling into place and my family continues to grow and flourish. We’ve had some medical and emotional setbacks- but my kids are resilient just like their momma! So I leave you with images of my favorite people, things and activities: