Stop dwelling/Transitions

Good Morning Fellow bloggers, I've been busy working & taking care of my family, it has been exhausting juggling all the responsibility, but I have faith that things will get better. I am starting to let go of friendships I thought were worth having, but I was hesitant & pondering on that decision. At the same time I am developing new relationships with my acquaintances @ SBMC. It seems like my work family is growing, I see these folks more than I see my biological children! Since nightshift is a different breed, we kind of depend on each other to get through the 13 hour shifts. I have added people to my work family, a couple of the ER nurses & techs have become really close to me. There are also some close ties with a few of my PACU nurses & a few of my respiratory & Oncology nurses as well, & I can not forget my ER docs & NPs!
I was talking to a couple of my staff nurses who are going through some tough situtations & they seem to think I am a strong person & seek my advice. I had one of my PACU nurses tell me, she wishes she was more like me, in strength & in humor, thanks Jennifer. But, to be honest I wasn't strong enough to leave my marriage, I was basically manipulated out of my home & lied to, & not to mention betrayed. I was devastated, I was physically & emotionally decapitated, I had become depressed & sad, I lost like 15 pounds in a matter of weeks, had hair loss & was inconsolable! I thought I married my soul mate, who took my family & me on, & would have never thought that he would cheat on me- we did everything together & were a force to reckon with. It was a total shock when he confessed his affair to me! All my friends thought I would be the one to step out of my marriage, just because I am such a sensual person, but I didn't. My loyalty to those I love is greater than any of my other characteristics, & I pride myself in that. So, Jennifer & Jobecca, thank you for the generous compliments, but I've come a long way & it wasn't easy, because even after everything my exhusband has done & not done, I will always love him. But, I love myself more & know that I deserve better & someone who is going to love me equally & not take me for granted.  So, I am no longer dwelling on what was, or who was & I am welcoming new transtions in my life. I still keep in touch with some of my SANE (sexual assault nurse examiners) in NM & they seem to think that I am a "mighty" woman & they admire the fact that I have kept strong & have continued to aspire & eventually conquer my dreams. I am so exited about the accelerated program for my DNP (doctorate of nurse practitioner).
But in the mean time, I continue to work & enjoy my new found work family. I would like to share some losses & gains that we've had within the last month:

Saying farewell to one of my ER techs, Steph- im going to miss yo crazy a**!

Steph & Janice (Peds ER, RN), she crazy 2!

Jaz (my diva guru & ER PAR) & Steph

I'm going to miss you Steph!

Steph & Adam (ER RN)

Jaz & Ms. Cricket EST (ghetto fabulous)

Ms. Cricket & Alicia (my make up guru & ER PAR)

Peter my ER PCC

Ms. Cricket & Steph (so dramatic)

Dr. Handler, one of my ER Docs

My mami & daughter, Sasha, as they gain strength

K my ER PCC, celebrating her bday @ work!

Give me some chocolate cake! K

Kelly, my coworker going to maternity leave- I made her a diaper cake! 

Love you Kells- congrats & good luck!

As you can see, my work family has grown- between my Hackensack sisters & brothers, & now I have more sisters & brothers @ Saint Barnabas. Life has kept me busy with work, & now that my daughters have graduated & my older son has fled my nest, I only have Shami (my 16 yr old son) to finish raising. My life has been full of surprises- some negative, some postive- but all are molding me to a person I am proud of. I still have many other transitions to go through & goals to achieve, I can't wait to see what God has in store for me, I will embrace it fearlessly!

Quotes:

As I work towards my goals & navigate through my life, I have to thank God for blessing me with friends who are genuine & blessing me with strength & courage to get through whatever situation I am in! Thank you God for all of my blessings, my health, strength, humor & not to forget my ferocious work ethic! I hope that my example penetrates through my children! Everything I do is because they drive me, they push me to be the most I can be- I love my brats:

From front to back: Sade, Sasha, Shadasha, Shuan, & Shamorr- my pride & joy, my triple threat (girls) & dynamic duo (boys)  in the hole! MY DRIVE!