Friday, June 5, 2020

Fear/Anxiety/Anger

Good evening bloggers,

It's been a while, but, I have been busy with the result of what COVID19 has caused me. Just when I thought I was managing my anxiety well, outrage breaks out due to another black life lost to blue hands! Which is confusing to me, this hatred of white vs. black, because this country has this misbelief that black lives are disposable & those black lives don't matter. But, if you look @ this country's history, you will learn that this country evolved on the backs of people of color. And people of color have been the success of this country. Without their hard work, this country would have no foundation!

Those who know me & my family know that we have conviction & passion! With that being said, all of my kids including my nephew share a deep desire to change the current culture of the dynamic of that minority lives don't matter in this country. My kids & grandkids are mixed with Latino & African American, so they are hated on a deeper level. The fact that they are educated & have passion & conviction make them an even bigger target for hatred! So this is what inspired this entry.

You see, my dilemma is that I raised all my kids to stand up for what's right & always help those who can't help themselves, to always advocate for the weak & shut down the wrong. So, this leads up to my boys now organizing protests & also puts them @ risk for being harmed or even killed!
My fear is that my adult children will be harmed or killed just because the tone of their skin! My anxiety is that I don't think I can handle another family member dying unnecessarily ! And my anger is that we still have to deal with this shit @ this day & age!

As a healthcare provider I know that death & illness know no boundaries! Disease & trauma is color blind, death doesn't care what color your skin is, how old you are & what titles are behind your name! We all bleed red & we all turn blue without oxygen! When will this country/world understand that we are all basically the same! We all want to be loved & accepted & it doesn't matter what the color of our skin is, we all die whether it be traumatically, tragically, or gracefully, we all have the same fate!
but what really distinguishes us as individuals, is how we treat our fellow human beings.

So I encourage you to treat each other with respect & dignity. For the sake of our future we need kindness & understanding to move forward. Let me remind you that one day you will be in my ICU bed & I will treat you with empathy, dignity & respect, no matter what skin color you have!



















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