Had such a wonderful day off I had to add more to my blog today. I accomplished all my goals today & even had some time to go visit my mami & take the brats to dinner. During dinner we had somewhat of a serious conversation, sometimes I forget that my kids have some wisdom to them. It got to me that both of my sons see me as a sad person- they saw a picture of me @ mami's house & Bebe stated, he wished I could go back to that happy person. It really made me realize, that even I fake being happy around them- they can see right through my mask. I explained to them, that it is going to take some time for me to heal, but I work on it everyday & with each day it gets better & better. I had to apologize to them because I should of not allowed this situation to affect my relationship with them, but I'm only human & unfortunately I do wear my heart on my sleeve.
But I am learning with each day how to react appropriately & be positive with situations whether they are negative or positive. Something that my youngest daughter said during dinner stuck with me- that Dasha does have her moments (love her so much)- she said: try not to wear your past on your shirt, put it in your pocket- I would just like to add to that- I think I will only share my past with a special person who will accept me for all that I am (& I am more than a hand full).
On a lighter note, we went home & finished cleaning the house & doing the laundry. I even got a chance to watch a show I have grown to like: keeping up with the Kardashians. I like this show, because they're a big family like mine & the 3 sisters remind me of my 3 beautiful daughters. I hope to one day find my Bruce Jenner! He reminds me of my father-in-law, always gentle & loves his family no matter how crazy they are, miss you Pop, hope all is well with you & the family- miss you guys dearly.
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