Delilafesto

I am not your ordinary woman
I enjoy intelligent conversations
I have an actively vivid imagination
My passion for life & my family is relentless
I am known to be loud, funny, & unfiltered, but I have the ability to be the most professional person you will ever know- I am excellent @ adapting like that!
My compassion makes me one of the best bedside nurses you will ever have
My modesty & humbleness makes me the favorite supervisor, as per my staff
My sexual desires make me an oddity, according to my ex-lovers
My layers of complexity make me a force to reckon with
My past experiences have fueled my strength & remind me to cherish people & not objects
I have certain expectations about how I want to be treated
So, if you step to me don't be intimidated, just approach me correctly & learn my worth!
My capabilities include, but are not limited to, healing & nurturing the sick, loving without boundaries, the ability to fix things & have pride in my work ethic!
My readiness to learn new things and not fearing new challenges @ any level: physical, mental, & emotional!
And no, I am not perfect, but, I know what I bring to the table.
I know my flaws & embrace them!
My inner joy, far exceeds what any living being can do to me!
I'm more than the sum of my parts!
And that's what makes me uniquely awesome!
~~~~~~~~~Delilafesto

Missing you immensely

Missing you immensely 

How I miss texting you inappropriate things & sayings

How I miss hearing your voice

How I miss seeing your face, especially your devilish smile

How I miss your goofy gestures 

How I miss the things you said

Oh my & how I miss the things we did 

Since you've been gone there hasn't been anybody who makes me feel like you did 

Although I have tried, you definitely left the bar high

How I miss our crazy rendezvous! 

And although I never said it, you knew I loved you, and I miss you saying it too

How much fun we had, the conversations we had

You reminded me of who I am, you made me feel beautiful & sexy again 

How I miss you? I miss you immensely!

Welcome to MY Queendom

Welcome to MY Queendom:

Where you are completely accepted in your entirety, flaws & all. You are encouraged to be yourself. You are celebrated for your uniqueness. You are appreciated for your genuineness and consistency. Your opinion and efforts are valued. Not only are you seen, you are heard and expected to contribute on all levels: emotionally, physically, spiritually and yes, financially! And KNOW that all these priveleges  given to you, my King, are the standard that you will be expected to reciprocate to your beloved Queen!

Self inspiration

Good evening bloggers,

I've been in a short media vacation. I have taken some time to date, & realized that I don't like the new dating seen! I've met some shady characters & a few nice guys. Some with sexual agendas & others that are confused about what they want!

I unfortunately know exactly what I want & I'm sorry I'm not settling for less. I have promised myself to maintain my standards & although it's exhausting introducing myself to new guys, I realize that I have come a long way. I have had some very interesting "relationship" encounters recently, but they all served a purpose & taught me very valuable lessons that I needed to learn in order to move forward. I've been told that I'm unique, passionate & intimidating. All compliments to my character., I can only be myself. And as I continue my journey in life, I continue to evolve, all for the best. I've only experienced romantic love 3 times in my life, so far, & I have to say that all 3 guys had their flaws & assets; but they all taught me different things about myself. That valuable knowledge has allowed me to learn how to inspire, depend, & challenge myself.

My experience has taught me that self evolution is difficult but necessary. And to be quite honest with you, I am becoming addicted to self challenges. It's hard to explain, but when you achieve something that you thought you were incapable of, & when you succeed the challenge: it's empowering! Being able to have self discipline, especially when it comes to sex (for me), is the ultimate rush!

I know my worth! My brutal honesty, loyalty, & passionate soul is my gift to my future partner!

Physically healng

hello bloggers,

I've been laying in my bed for the past 6 days, sickened with what I believe to be the flu. Not being able to watch TV, due to light sensitivity, or read due to headaches has been very challenging for me. But I have spent the last 144 hours with my thoughts & the only being that can't get infected by my sickness, stinky Marley. Between the fevers & all the meds I've been taking I've managed to have very lucid dreams, which have been a form of closure with my mom & brother. I'm @ peace with  their deaths & no longer feel left or abandoned, I now feel like they are always with me & have been.
As for my thoughts, it has come to my attention that @ 44 years old, I am finally comfortable with who I have become. Being by myself has taught me some much needed discipline, & although I still struggle with my fleshly needs, I have learned how to avoid negative people & wrong situations. I now move forward with hope & optimism. I have learned to rely on myself when it comes to companionship. I read & write much more than I use to & I really enjoy spending time with people who are really important to me. And it has become crucial for me to challenge myself, mentally & physically, I never thought that after everything that I have been through, that I am now standing even stronger than I was before. Take nothing for granted, your losses make room for better things, your gains confirm your ability. And although I'm sick & can hardly finish my thoughts or what I want to write for that matter I am content & most importantly happy with just me!

           

                                                 
As you can see the fevers are clearing & the meds are finally taking a toll, but even like this, I am happy!

Writing for my sanity

Hey bloggers,

It's been a while, allot has happened, but I keep on moving forward with positive energy. Let me begin by telling you the good news, I have transferred to CSICU (Cardiac Surgery Intensive Care Unit); I'm definitely mentally challenging myself, I am learning so much & have done SICU (Surgical Intensive Care Unit), MICU ( Medical Intensive Care), & CICU (Cardiac Intensive Care Unit) rotations. I have opened another door to a wealth of knowledge & have met some really seasoned critical care nurses! I hope to soak everything up & develop my bedside skills. Work life has been awesome, working days for the last 3 months has allowed me to see how things run during the day, my observation: busy as hell. I have a new found respect for the day shift nurses! You guys rock!

Moving onto my family: this year my girls turn 27, 26, 25 & my boys turn 21 & 19; not to mention my grands who will turn 1 & 2 next year! Wow! How time flies! My girls are already thinking about PA ( Physician Assistant ) school, post grad school, & grad school! My boys are moving forward as well, my 21 year old is debating coming back home to work on his music,& my 19 year old is working on starting college & looking forward to a computer engineering major! I can't forget to mention my Marley, she had 2 seizures last weekend & we took her to the emergency room & was told they were benign episodes, for now. So we are diligently watching over her, for now.

As for my social life, since I've been working the day shift for the last 3 months I have been enjoying my nightly rendezvous with my bed! And since most of my close friends work nights except for Denise, who would rather watch TV than go out; I have been spending allot of quality time with myself! I'm learning that I make my own happiness & that I am determined to succeed in all my endeavors! I have been reading allot self help articles, exercising & meditating. Being alone has
taught me allot of self discipline, which has allowed me to rediscover my worth.

And now for the bad news, somebody who I believed to be close to me, passed. This person was very instrumental in my healing process when I was broken. And for that I will be forever thankful, he restored my confidence & reminded me of what I'm made of & what makes me unique. His passing has giving me yet another prospective on life, never take friendships for granted.

On that note, I'm sending all positive energy & sharing some happy memories with you!

Miss my 4LW family!

My 19 year old is really trying to make his way! 

My girls moving onward & forward! 

My California family always call me & keep me motivated! 

My Eli, his smile reminds me to keep it moving! 

My me time gives me solace 

My Somaya, giving me more motivation as she gets older

My girls who remind me to enjoy myself, because I deserve it!

Enjoy your holidays & appreciate your loved ones!

More

Good morning bloggers, 
Couldn't sleep last night & my mind went into author mode, so here is what my mind cranked out! Enjoy:
More:

As I continue to celebrate my fabulous 44 years of living & continue to travel & visit family & friends, I ask myself why do I want more? Is it because I give more so I feel like I am entitled to more, or is because I deserve more! More, you ask, more of what? I want more time with my family, more knowledge for work, more wisdom for my personal life. I want to create more cherished memories with my friends, I want more energy from my grandchildren. I want more love, more intimacy, more consistency! Am I wrong for wanting more? I don't think so, I have more to give & expect to receive more! No I'm not needy I'd rather refer to myself as a positive force to reckon with. I am a people person, not sure if it's a curse or a blessing; but whatever it is I'm running with it! 

I found out yesterday morning that my sister is sick, & although we're not close, I worry about her. I made a promise to my mom that I would work on our relationship to make a stronger bond between us, but anybody who knows her, knows how difficult that can be! No matter how she is, I have to fix us! After all we are all we got. So I pray, and ask God to give me the strength, energy, & wisdom to make this bond tight & positive. So now I ask for more time with her, more memories with her & more love between us!